Like anyone, we get tired of the same old arguments that go no where and will never have a different outcome. And so it is when you live with an Alzheimer’s brain. You can’t predict when it will come but you know it’s out there lurking.
Last night it arrived again. My Dad decided he wanted to drive down the road. It has been months since we took the keys to his car but he doesn’t remember. We had the discussion with him, explaining that it was the right thing to do. We explained that in order to keep him safe and to protect him from the guilt he would feel if his driving caused injury or death to someone, he just couldn’t drive anymore. He agreed. That was then, this is now.
When he could not find his keys last night, he launched a verbal attack on my Mom. She, like the rest of us, can only take so much. It wasn’t long before it had become a heated argument and my phone rang. After a lengthy session of reasoning with my Dad, he gave up but clearly he was still angry. And, he said he would not forgive or forget. Now we all know he will forget, until the next time.
There is no real point to this entry today. I share only because I know that somewhere out there, someone else is going through the same thing and feeling like I do – helpless and sad. When I get this way, I remind myself that this disease is harder on the families of the person with Alzheimer’s than it is the person living in the Alzheimer’s World. There are no easy answers; no magic wands to wave. We simply take it one minute at a time and deal with each crisis as it arises. There is no preparation that can stop the same old, same old of Alzheimer’s. So, I repeat to myself….”minute by minute” and it helps.