There has been no time for writing lately. In fact, there has been no time for much of anything. Each day of the last six weeks has been spent trying to hold my own life together while trying to create a new life for Mom and Dad. There were days when it seemed impossible and days where I wondered if it was worth the effort. But every once in a while there was a glimmer of sunshine that sustained me and today I can report that Dad is finally starting to settle in.
Make no mistake; this has been hard. The challenges tested me and there were times when I questioned my own faith and strength. If I were to give advice to anyone else in my situation it would be to simply – hang on. Time does indeed take care of most of the difficulties you face when placing a parent in an assisted living facility.
We chose the right facility. Of that I have no doubt at all. The staff is wonderful and the facility provides for all my parents needs. They are safe. They are well fed. And, they are not alone anymore. Although it is not perfect, the care they receive is far greater than anything I could have done for them. I can’t say that I have come to complete terms with my guilt but there is a real sense of relief that permits me to sleep at night again.
I have many stories to share and will do so in the days to come. For now, I simply wanted to say – things are better and that was our ultimate goal. Decisions you make for aging parents will never be easy but they will be right, if made with love.
Remember though, love doesn’t ease the pain.